I believe, based purely on my observations, that a challenge for a people manager is helping their team define their fear. What do I mean?

Individual Contributors are trying to do the work that's asked of them and achieve a result in a way that causes them little-to-no-stress and (hopefully) helps them earn their bonus. Also, they likely care deeply for their work and their outcomes. But they're also scared.

They're scared of giving you "real" feedback. They're scared of telling you what's really up with their book of business. They are scared of telling you that they're not happy in their work and are looking for another job. What are they scared of?

We don't know. That's the problem.

I recently advised a family member that they should tell their employer that they starting a job search. "But, David, what if Sally Sue doesn't find a job and now she's stuck at her current job?"

Here's another example...

I had an Individual Contributor tell me that they intended to start a job search. As a person, job searches excite me because I enjoy helping people with them. (As a manager at a company, I realize that it's not the best thing for the company.) I said to the person, "that's exciting! What are you looking to get to do more of in your new role that you are not doing here?" It was clear that the person was shocked with the response, they didn't know what to expect.

And that's the learning!

Fear is a feeling from needing to feel the safety of expectation, but expectation is not there.

If you are leading a team, realize that your Individual Contributors want to know what to expect - not just from the job, but from you as a person. Be upfront. Show them that you are who you say you are, and let them know it's safe for them to be themselves with you. Hey, you might just develop a healthy friendship out of it!

If you are not a leader and wondering what to do with this post... realize that you have fears because you need the safety of an expectation. During times when safety doesn't feel right around the corner, it's easy to give into fear. Instead of giving in, leverage it. That's tomorrow's post.