"A leader must make whatever horror exists concrete. Only then will people be able to break it apart." - Abraham Lincoln.

Imagine a moment when someone you trusted announced a change. Perhaps they were leaving? Perhaps someone passed away? Perhaps there is a separation? Perhaps someone let someone down?

Now imagine what it's like to be the person receiving that message.

• What happened?

• Did I do something?

• What does this mean for me?

• What am I going to do?

• Who's going to take care of me?

• What about my family?

• Does this impact my bonus?

• What about our home? Our car? Our pool?

It's possible that we go through that process of frantic inquiry because we're afraid. We don't know what's going to follow and suddenly our foundation feels weak.

So what can that person we trust, that leader, do?

Define the fear.

That leader can say:

• Someone is leaving.

• I get that this is shocking/frustrating/sad/(insert emotion here) news for you. I imagine others feel the same as you now.

• That means the following will happen....

• This is what it means for you now...

• This is what this might mean for you in the future...

• Here's what you can do now to find out more.

• Here's what we are doing now to help people like you who are concerned about ___.

As a leader, I spend most of my time helping people define fear. Using questions to help them uncover the truth behind what's going on. If you, a leader yourself, can do that more and more, you'll find that your team will come together and bond stronger than those that don't.

Define the fear.

Give people something to hold on to.

Tether them to the truth.